Why I Fell In Love With Breathwork
Iâve been in therapy in one form or another since I was 14 years old. Throughout my life, Iâve had to heal from a lot of trauma as well as grapple with the resulting anxiety & depression. And, later, the pervasive burnout that came from a lifetime of avoiding the pain at the root of it all.
Now donât get me wrong, I do love therapy and think itâs an amazing and supportive practice. But the first time I experienced a breathwork session? I couldnât believe how quickly I was able to work through my trauma! Things Iâd spent years trying to process out loud were released from my body within a single session.
This doesnât surprise me now, as a certified trauma-informed somatic coach & breathwork guide. In fact, itâs actually not uncommon for people to be retraumatized by having to verbally explain traumatic events over & over again.
With breathwork, we discover where unprocessed emotions from the trauma are being stored in the body - wreaking havoc while stuck there. We get to sit with them and finally listen to the message they have been waiting so long to deliver - maybe even years or decades. And then we get to release them from our bodies so we donât have to keep lugging that same pain around throughout our days.
Iâve watched breathwork bring about incredible, fast, & fascinating healing uplevels for countless people. Hereâs why it could do the same for you.
Too Anxious To Meditate? Try Breathwork
As much as I wanted to like silent meditation, it never really worked for me. My thoughts would get too loud and Iâd get fidgety and restless.
Breathwork is different.
A skilled guide will give you an intentional breathing pattern to support whatever youâre trying to work through.
It could be as simple as a 4444 breath, where you breathe in for a count of 4, hold for a count of 4, breathe out for 4, hold for 4 and repeat.
It could be as powerful as a triactive breath, where you quickly suck in 2 inhales all the way down to the bottom of your lungs then forcefully blow all the air out in one quick gust through the mouth. (This is a good one for when you want to release something that is stuck.)
You can move energy more gently with a halo breath: a pattern of single forceful inhales & exhales through the mouth.
The intentional breathing pattern is why youâre unlikely to get stuck in an anxiety spiral during a guided breathwork session.
Normal breathing is autonomic- meaning your body takes care of it without you having to think about it or even be aware of it at all.
But an intentional breathing pattern is something you have to think about to do- at least until you get the hang of it and the rhythm takes over as you achieve a trance-like state. Focusing on an intentional breathing pattern doesnât leave enough room for your anxiety monologue to take center stage in your mind.
So, if youâve wanted to get that lovely zen calm people talk about with meditation- but youâve never been able to quiet your mind long enough to have a good meditation experience- try breathwork.
Guided Breathwork Is Like Doing Shadow Work With a Night Light
Itâs true that breathwork opens space for you to feel what youâve been avoiding or repressing.
But, it teaches your body (and your mind!) that you can survive feeling your feelings. And that you are safe to feel your feelings.
Every inhale is you living in spite of whatever pain previously felt too overwhelming to face.
Every exhale allows some of that tension to release from your body.
Did you know the bodyâs chemical cycle of an emotional reaction to stimulus only takes 90 seconds to cycle through? Imagine breathing through grief for just a minute and a half and then going about your day, no longer afraid the pain will pull you under.
You also have a safety net in the form of a guide. As a certified trauma-informed breathwork guide who leads sessions over Zoom, I build safety into each breathwork experience.
At the beginning of each session, I teach a somatic or body-based tool for how to deactivate a trauma response should things get too intense. It can be as simple as tapping your opposite thigh with each hand.
I also ask participants to leave their cameras on if at all possible during the session. That way, I can see if someone is getting too activated and needs to be pulled out. Though, throughout my years as a coach and as a student of breathwork- Iâve never witnessed a freak out or meltdown during a breathwork session. (Often, people find it quite relaxing!)
The Gift of The Possibility of Accountability
My people are hardcore dissociating professionals. Amazing pillars of strength who have achieved incredible things despite surviving some major shit. I love them because I am them.
But hereâs the thing: the survival patterns we developed to make it through our past traumas so often become present day self-sabotage.
I see this a lot with my Burnout Recovery clients. For example:
đ©Staying up all night to over-achieve so often they never get enough sleep and their health, mood, communication, & relationships all suffer.
đ©Never saying ânoâ so they never have time to meet their own needs - let alone have some downtime- which makes them feel irritable and resentful. And that makes them lash out- which hurts their relationships.
đ©Trying to fit in so much that they have to have a hyper-organized, hyper-detailed schedule and theyâll have a complete meltdown should someone shift plans even a little tiny bit. Tantrums & relationship trouble ensues.
đ© Being so busy they donât have time to stop and consider how things are going in their life. They donât know what their big goals are or what they want for dinner. Unable to identify their own wants and needs, they canât communicate them. And so, they rarely have them met. Resentment City, Population: You.
So many folks arenât aware they do this at all. And how would they, when they donât have the time to pause and reflect?
Thatâs actually why Iâve taglined The Breathwork Club âan hour of fucking relief.â I know my people. We donât think we have a ton of time to spare for ourselves. So, Breathwork Club is just an hour a month to breathe. Doable, right?
And look: how can you ever be accountable to:
đ§The ones you love
đ§Your goals
đ§Your higher calling
đ§Yourself
⊠if you never ever have time or space to reflect on how your life is going? Whatâs working and what isnât? Whatâs your responsibility to change and what is other peopleâs stuff that you have no control over? How would you know where a boundary is needed? How would you know when youâre out of alignment with your values and dreams? How would you know if youâre not getting what you need
For me, breathwork made it possible for me to be accountable.
Breathwork brought me life-changing clarity about what it was that I wanted and needed. It showed me where I needed to show up for myself to get what I wanted and needed. It showed me where my boundaries were, and brought me clarity about how to communicate them.
Iâve watched breathwork bring life-changing clarity to so many others as well.
Life-Changing Clarity, Wherever You Need It
I find breathwork to be most potent when we set a clear intention for what we are using it for. As a guide, Iâve helped people use breathwork to:
đ§Get unstuck from a past trauma
đ§Establish a sense of safety
đ§Reclaim their professional focus
đ§Awaken their creativity
đ§Release old habits
đ§Imagine a better future
đ§Process grief
đ§Understand & release resistance to reaching a goal
đ§Identify self-sabotaging patterns and how to change them
đ§Experience peace, release, & relief
Thatâs why weâll be working with a personal development theme each month of Breathwork Club.
We start in December with the theme of Release: clearing away the goals that we think we âshouldâ want, but donât actually. In January, weâll gain Clarity about what we do want, and in February, weâll be Clearing the space to prioritize our true desires.
You are more than welcome to join us. The Burnout Fairy đ§ Breathwork Club is just what it sounds like: an hour of fucking relief during a monthly guided breathwork session on a personal development theme. In between live sessions, youâll receive optional journaling prompts if youâd like to go deeper with the insights & revelations that came up during your breathwork session.
You can join The Burnout Fairy đ§ Breathwork Club here.
